National Novel Writing Month? What the hell? I had a nice, simple month of work, study and testing the concepts of why the word “Catapult” begins with “Cat.” I sit back and ponder my mellow month when I hear the words, “If you write they will shut the hell up.”
“If you write they will shut the hell up.”
So I’m all geared up to write. Who’s shutting the hell up? That’s the mystery.
Well here it is a third of the way into the month of March and I get my “Masters of Macabre” competition packet. My mind’s spinning dozens of twisted phobias I can turn into a fantastic piece of prose.
Now I’m not one to say the Fates like to twiddle with me, but when the e-mail with my listed items starts out with, “Henry- Hey, I don’t choose the items… I do it by roll of the dice, just like any self-respecting gamer,” you know the rest of the message is going to be interesting.
So what’s my horrible phobia I have to deal with? They were actually “kind” enough (can you smell the sarcasm, here, folks?) to offer me my choice from four along the same topic. Sex phobias, ladies and gentlemen, I get to write a horror story having to do with sex phobias.
Somewhere in the distance there’s a sixty-year-old chainsaw wielding virgin with self-denial issues just laughing her fool head off.
It’s been a while since I’ve taken part in a contest and was invited to take part in the first annual “Masters of Macabre” competition. For this inaugural event, each competitor is randomly given an occasion, an item and a phobia. Sounds like fun, right? If you don’t think so take a little time and see how many of those twisted little fears humanity has governing our lives. From the fear of religion to panic attacks when the elevator doors close, there’s something to pick at everyone’s nerves.